Feb 10, 2009

understanding the other kind!

Well i strongly disagree with all those who say that men are from Mars and women are from Venus, because clearly the two are not even from the same galaxy! Its pretty evident that we don’t speak the same language, men talk, women feel, when the man wants to feel, the woman just wants to sleep!;D

With Valentine’s day approaching, there seems to be a temporary truce of sorts, but its like a calm before the storms to come. So while the rest of humanity pondered about the economy and world peace, i decided to find a solution to the war of the sexes!

Well , wikipedia wasn’t too helpful,hindi teleserials... had too many shocking camera zooming moments to really understand anything, femina though interesting was too biased, times of india filled the relationship space with English footballer WAGs. Well after many such failed attempts i decided to look, where i should have looked in the first place! THE BIBLE! And i did find a profound answer! Here it is!

However, let each man of you love his wife as his very own self, and let the wife see that she respects and reverences her husband. Ephesians 5:33

I have read past this statement a hundred times, too simplistic isn’t it? Thats what i thought too, till a preacher pointed out a key facet to this verse that if followed could bring an end to the war in the household!

What is truly amazing is that man is not asked to revere his wife nor is the woman asked to love her husband, somehow our mind goes into auto-correct and misses this significant point, we just assume that it is vice-versa. But no!

Well the reason is women love their husbands anyway, they show it many different ways, they make his favorite food, they notice the little slump in his shoulders, they tell him that they care,they understand and provide a ready ear for his problems, they are sympathetic to his hopes and dreams, they are a balm to his aching bones at the end of a hard day. Women are the epitome of love shown in gestures.


Men dont know this and seldom reciprocate in kind! The imbecile believes that the first time he said “I love you” should last him a lifetime! He actually thinks that women sense whats in his heart and he does not need to voice them. He is also convinced that his physical presence in times of turmoil amounts to caring.

So the bible urges the neanderthal cave men to express their love, show that they care, love his wife!

Female society works on loving, caring and verbally affirming their thoughts, men hardly function on these lines, male society centers on the magic mantra of Respect! In this world your worth is measured by how much your respected. Respect can be earned by a variety of means, the fastest, strongest,biggest, smartest, richest and all the other ‘ests’ win lots of respect, but so will the guy who can gulp down a bottle of liquor in a minute, or the person who can stand up to his boss, men tend to be extra competitive, everything is a race! Women dismiss this as childish ego clashes, but for men, its a way of being!

Men give each other respect, they are natural at identifying and providing for those who deserve this respect! Why is it that the geeky professor who commands the respect of all his peers fails in the dating game? Because women dont respect some guy who has spent years learning the intimate regions of a mainframe than the intricate complexities of a relationship!

What a man wants is this respect, and if a woman wants to make him happy and content, she must give him this respect, identify and appreciate the things he is able to provide, tell him how much better he is at mowing the garden compared to the much better looking neighbour. Tell him that he did a great job fixing the t’v, who cares if he made your colour t’v into a black and white one! Tell him your with him because he’s better than the other men, that will be his moment of glory!

In a nutshell, give them what they want! Women want love, give it to them, men want some respect, give him some! Because we’re wired in such a way that women will always show love toward their husbands and men will always respect his wife, those skills are innate, its the skills that we acquire that will help us in understanding the other kind!


Archana said...

once again..the pic has kept up the humour quotient of thy blog!

age old topic revisited..gud bit of funda..n i thought those hindi teleserials u watch were a waste of time!..atleast it helps bring out Thudl's sensitive side like this!
this is one valentine's day article that the anti-valentine lunatics wont protest about!

nicely written conclusion in the end Thudly!

scribbleworld said...

The verse is just PERFECT but you seem to have understood it a little differently:).

It says , "Women should respect their husbands and men should love their wives" but the fact remains, you cant love someone you don't respect. Women must be provided with love ,respect and a lot more.

A very few men are really capable of figuring out what the "lot more" is all about;).

One more teeny weeny thing... love doesn't really mean expressive love:)so one doesn't really have to keep screaming it out.The whole idea here is to "STOP EXPECTING AND START GIVING:).

Lovely little article. I enjoyed reading every bit of it(mostly because i have so much to talk against it;)>.We could debate about this sometime.I still don't know how you know so much about the "feeling" bit:)....

Rohith said...

Interesting article, i must say.
It is an age old topic, but what can anyone say? The battle of the sexes is one that has been going on for generations!

Some very good points well made, although the opposite sex would beg to differ. I don't wanna go there. We guys would lose any argument when it comes to such a touchy topic :)

This article will surely compete with the advertisements of a certain satellite TV service in trying to put forward some of those points ;-)

Good one dude, a great article!

Rohith said...

Ouch! @scribbleworld
Guess we posted comments at the same time, read your's after posting mine.

I told you so! :)

THUDL said...

@scib see my point is....men KNOW that they must respect...but DONT KNOW that they must be loving and caring.....
WOMEN know that they must be loving....they dont know that they must revere their husbands.

atleast i didnt, just this lack of knowledge about what the other wants is what leads to problems!

1. i dont watch teleserials
2. my sensitive side went on a vacation, and is missing since
3. this one is meant for those who truely wanna make their relationship better.
4. i get the pics with an image search

@Rohith well come to think off it, we lost the battle a long time back, this just the stupid resistance like in the matrix, the machines are still under control!;)

doggyears said...

Makes a whole lot of sense....thank u for not being a chauvinist,.....

Very matured thinking....

I've read the bible verse too...but u've hit the nail.....

Well if gentlemen n ladies were to read ur article n lived in it's understanding...relationships would be lived more meaningfully...n not just out of helplessness or compromises ....

Nice advice...somethin I shall follow


THUDL said...

@dogyears you've really understood the spirit of what i tried to imply, wuhoo!:)

Ace of Spades said...

nice way of playing the debate. and the bible quote was a good one (despite my mom saying that even the devil could quote the bible to his benefit)

i wont post my thoughts here now - they have been torn apatr enough in other debates where there was an excess of girl power.

but i like the conslusion, its simplistic and easy wnough to follow - at least in theory.

THUDL said...

@ace of spades : women seem to have become the self conferred experts in the bastion of relationships!

we have to agree or shut up! :D live and let live i'd say!

scribbleworld said...

Your final comment was better than your blog;).hehehehehehehehhehehehehhehehehehe